John: Now there’s another way we can look at your dream (see The Manuscript and Hiding in Plain Sight). In it you’re acting like there are certain little things that need to happen, but a part of you knows better than that. There’s the symbolism of the office, and the author is a depiction of a type of wealth – books, universal wisdom, or however you want to look at it. The wealth of that aspect is opening up, but it can be grounded just as quickly. At some point earlier for you, this energy was opened up but it didn’t go into your life in the right way, so it had to be shut off because otherwise it was an abuse.
There’s a very interesting way of looking at this type of abuse, or misuse. For example, when Adam ate of the Tree of Knowledge, he was banished from Paradise. In the end, it was said that this was part of the Will of God, because what was important was that Adam become God’s deputy on earth. Adam wasn’t meant to sit in Paradise. So in a sense he had to screw up so that he then could be on earth, yet still have the deputy quality inside. And so his journey back to God is one of redemption, surrender, and forgiveness; turning towards the real all over again. That would not have been possible had he stayed in Paradise.
That’s why it’s said that the closer, and higher, you get to a particular quality of realization inside, if you misstep, the devastation of the fall is that much greater. At the same time, the devastation of the fall, and the veils that come with it, are all part of a greater plan and understanding. As you then work your way back, however long it takes, to where you had fallen off the pinnacle, you then bring in more gravity, more clarity, and more appreciation. You take on an expanded or evolved role. That’s the development journey.
So that’s the flip side of the setbacks that take place. Each one causes you to build a more refined and stable overall beingness, which has the quality of, and relates to, a very deep thought – man being just a thought of God in its truest essence – that then works with all other thoughts or onenesses without deviation. Whatever it takes to create that appreciation and awareness is what tends to happen.
In Adam’s particular case, he felt guilty and he grieved. He slunk around as if he could actually hide himself from God. He went through all kinds of gyrations that did nothing to help his predicament, and for long periods of time it actually made the situation denser, until he finally reached a turning point where he could find forgiveness.
Of course, this process was very confusing because nothing like it had ever been seen before. Before this, the angels were in a singing-the-glory-and-praises modality. Then they were tasked with service toward man, to bow before man. Adam is walking around, an abomination, and yet the angels were supposed to recognize that there’s something more going on even though they didn’t understand it.
It takes a long time before it can be recognized that something more is to emerge as a result. If you look at it from the angelic standpoint, it could look like Satan won the battle. But no! Satan only has a role to play as part of this whole thing. And Satan can more perfectly play the role because he too is linked to Creation, because his roots are in the high plateaus of Creation. So he can be effective in a way that the angels can’t. He can be a worthy opponent against man, giving man something to stretch against as part of opening up this greater dimension. The stretching and the struggle can cause man to take on more of the deputy role.
So that’s kind of an overview of the whole thing. The same pattern exists when you are coming back to this huge inner dimension of yourself: you fell, and now you have worked your way back and are ready to assume the mantle again. We even experience this process as simply as when we’re walking around and we’re perturbed or dense about something and we can’t shake it off, and then suddenly we’re feeling gleeful and happy because we can sense that we’re very close to something, you know, on the verge of breaking through.
This is the territory your dream is playing in.